登陆注册
4909000000071

第71章

One had scratched her finger, another had a whitlow; this one had risen in the morning with the white of her eye bloodshot; that one had put her finger out, telling her beads. All had some little thing the matter with them.

"Ah! you have lied to our mother; your nails are marked with white," said one to her neighbour.

"You stopped a long time at confession this morning, sister," said another. "You must have a good many little sins to confess."

As there is nothing resembles a pussy-cat so much as a tom-cat, they would swear eternal friendship, quarrel, sulk, dispute and make it up again; would be jealous, laugh and pinch, pinch and laugh, and play tricks upon the novices.

At times they would say, "Suppose a gendarme came here one rainy day, where should we put him?"

"With Sister Ovide; her cell is so big he could get into it with his helmet on."

"What do you mean?" cried Sister Ovide, "are not all our cells alike?"

Thereupon the girls burst out laughing like ripe figs. One evening they increased their council by a little novice, about seventeen years of age, who appeared innocent as a new-born babe, and would have had the host without confession. This maiden's mouth had long watered for their secret confabulations, little feasts and rejoicings by which the nuns softened the holy captivity of their bodies, and had wept at not being admitted to them.

"Well," said Sister Ovide to her, "have you had a good night's rest, little one?"

"Oh no!" said she, "I have been bitten by fleas."

"Ha! you have fleas in your cell? But you must get rid of them at once. Do you know how the rules of our order enjoin them to be driven out, so that never again during her conventional life shall a sister see so much as the tail of one?"

"No," replied the novice.

"Well then, I will teach you. Do you see any fleas here? Do you notice any trace of fleas? Do you smell an odour of fleas? Is there any appearance of fleas in my cell? Look!"

"I can't find any," said the little novice, who was Mademoiselle de Fiennes, "and smell no odour other than our own."

"Do as I am about to tell you, and be no more bitten. Directly you feel yourself pricked, you must strip yourself, lift your chemise, and be careful not to sin while looking all over your body; think only of the cursed flea, looking for it, in good faith, without paying attention to other things; trying only to catch the flea, which is a difficult job, as you may easily be deceived by the little black spots on your skin, which you were born with. Have you any, little one?"

"Yes," cried she. "I have two dark freckles, one on my shoulder and one on my back, rather low down, but it is hidden in a fold of the flesh."

"How did you see it?" asked Sister Perpetue.

"I did not know it. It was Monsieur de Montresor who found it out."

"Ha, ha!" said the sister, "is that all he saw?"

"He saw everything," said she, "I was quite little; he was about nine years old, and we were playing together...."

The nuns hardly being able to restrain their laughter, Sister Ovide went on--"The above-mentioned flea will jump from your legs to your eyes, will try and hide himself in apertures and crevices, will leap from valley to mountain, endeavouring to escape you; but the rules of the house order you courageously to pursue, repeating aves. Ordinarily at the third ave the beast is taken."

"The flea?" asked the novice.

"Certainly the flea," replied Sister Ovide; "but in order to avoid the dangers of this chase, you must be careful in whatever spot you put your finger on the beast, to touch nothing else.... Then without regarding its cries, plaints, groans, efforts, and writhings, and the rebellion which frequently it attempts, you will press it under your thumb or other finger of the hand engaged in holding it, and with the other hand you will search for a veil to bind the flea's eyes and prevent it from leaping, as the beast seeing no longer clearly will not know where to go. Nevertheless, as it will still be able to bite you, and will be getting terribly enraged, you must gently open its mouth and delicately insert therein a twig of the blessed brush that hangs over your pillow. Thus the beast will be compelled to behave properly. But remember that the discipline of our order allows you to retain no property, and the beast cannot belong to you. You must take into consideration that it is one of God's creatures, and strive to render it more agreeable. Therefore, before all things, it is necessary to verify three serious things--viz.: If the flea be a male, if it be female, or if it be a virgin; supposing it to be a virgin, which is extremely rare, since these beasts have no morals, are all wild hussies, and yield to the first seducer who comes, you will seize her hinder feet, and drawing them under her little caparison, you must bind them with one of your hairs, and carry it to your superior, who will decide upon its fate after having consulted the chapter. If it be a male--"

"How can one tell that a flea is a virgin? asked the curious novice.

"First of all," replied Sister Ovide, "she is sad and melancholy, does not laugh like the others, does not bite so sharp, has her mouth less wide open, blushes when touched--you know where."

"In that case," replied the novice, "I have been bitten by a male."

At this the sisters burst out laughing so heartily that one of them sounded a bass note and voided a little water and Sister Ovide pointing to it on the floor, said--"You see there's never wind without rain."

The novice laughed herself, thinking that these chuckles were caused by the sister's exclamation.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 低碳生活:为了我们的地球家园

    低碳生活:为了我们的地球家园

    旨在引导新时代的青少年一起行动起来,为了我们共同的家园,用自己的实际行动把生活耗用能量降到最低,从而减少二氧化碳的排放,实现绿色低碳生活。低碳生活是一种态度,也是一种责任,更是一种爱,让我们的爱更宽广,更包容,更细致吧!
  • 春风十里玉门关

    春风十里玉门关

    她是威震四海八方的顾家将军,敌人无不闻风丧胆,同僚也常被她的冷面吓得不敢多话。就连小孩深夜啼哭,也被借她的名字用以威吓。不过……“回来了?”“禀皇上,臣幸不辱命,凯旋而归。”顾清若沉声应答。“说重点!”“……我发誓我绝对没有受伤!”顾清若特地举了三根手指表示肯定。“是么?”冷眸一抬:“那便让朕‘检查’一下。”顾清若表示:下了战场上龙床,脱了战袍换云裳,她鸭梨也很大的好么……本文日更,女将军X皇帝,强强联手,共赏江山。
  • 当NPC来做游戏

    当NPC来做游戏

    游戏设计师意外去世,留下一个未完成的冒险游戏。游戏主角为了完成拯救公主的任务,只能亲自动手将游戏补完。这是一个讲述npc开公司做游戏的故事!书友群:766863477 另外,新书《不浪漫奇幻世界》已经发布了,刚开始写,比较慢热的,感兴趣的可以先收藏着,非常感谢!
  • 青少年走近伟人丛书·传记故事·邓小平

    青少年走近伟人丛书·传记故事·邓小平

    邓小平,早年赴欧洲勤工俭学,并成为中国共产党党员开始革命生涯。归国后,他全身心地投入党领导的争取民族独立和人民解放的革命斗争。从土地革命、抗日战争到解放战争,先后担任党和军队的许多重要领导职务,为党中央一系列重大战略决策的实施,为新民主主义革命的胜利和新中国的诞生,建立了赫赫功勋,成为中华人民共和国的开国元勋。他还是是中国社会主义改革开放和现代化建设的总设计师,创立了邓小平理论。他所倡导的“改革开放”及“一国两制”政策理念,改变了20世纪后期的中国,也影响了世界。
  • 嫡妻攻略

    嫡妻攻略

    【双处1对1,男强女也强】【非穿越,前期慢热,主打婚后精彩生活】—◆—她是正妻所生嫡女,出身书香门第,清流人家,生来有城府,善于谋算。自小受母亲教导,深谙后院诸事,却从不依仗嫡女身份作威作福。众人看来,她是知书达理的大家闺秀,可偏偏庶女姨娘不肯安生,非要逼得她出手庶妹攀附富贵?那就再加一把火,送她嫁入心心念念的‘高门’。姨娘下毒暗害?那就以其人之道还治其人之身,也让姨母尝尝这毒药的滋味。—◆—洛婉书想要的不过是家宅安宁、岁月静好,待到出嫁年纪听从媒妁之言、父母之命嫁人,从此相夫教子,操持中馈,等到与丈夫相看生厌之时再为他纳几房妾室,也算全了她此生贤良嫡妻的名声。却不想,一纸天家婚事,她竟嫁给当朝丞相……早就听闻当朝丞相少年老成,城府难测,暴戾阴狠,一人之下万人之上。日日面对这样权倾天下、不苟言笑的夫君,洛婉书光想一想,就觉得双腿发软。只是这日子怎么会越过越甜呢?—◆—精彩片段:丞相回府,不见夫人,问管家:“夫人呢?”管家:“回娘家省亲。”丞相脸黑,坐于书案,执笔处理公务,将三日工作量交予夫人父亲,且一日完成,实在阴险。夫人气得杀回府,正中丞相下怀。
  • 系统坑爹中

    系统坑爹中

    梁艺本是A市某大学的学生,本应在漫漫时光里悠闲度日,谁知道一朝不甚被系统诱拐,不得不走上了一坑更比一坑深的成(辛)长(酸)道路……前两个世界刚写,略毒,后面慢慢就好了。另外,对本书的内容做一下补充说明,本书有男主,但是除了前两个世界外,后面大部分都是打酱油,还有很多世界不会出现。真正出现的时候差不多就该结局了,还有就是女主绝对不靠男主,因为男主比女主弱。(PS:前两个世界除外,因为前两个刚写有点把握不好,也只有前两个世界玩攻略后面基本没有任务为主。)
  • 千丝解

    千丝解

    世界战乱四起,权谋盛,天道崩,无一人踏碎虚空,收帝海,踏上苍,握命运,解千丝,判古今,了却吾千世情丝。
  • 前世今生之暴君请温柔

    前世今生之暴君请温柔

    前世,他是天帝之子。她是莲花女神。他,霸道无双。她,貌美倾城。她桃花树下一舞,迷惑了他的心。他们倾心相待,却不料她中了无法解的毒。轮回后他,盛昊天,盛国国君,这样就够了吧!今生能遇到她,是他最大的幸福。她,苏颜落,一朝穿越,成了相府的二小姐,遇到了让她心悸的他,成了他的后,当他们以为可以无所顾忌的在一起的时候,却不料她中了忘情蛊。是命运的捉弄还是又一次的阴谋。他,轩辕熠,轩国太子,为她倾心,为她放弃整个江山,只愿能博得她一笑。他,洛辰汐,汐落阁,阁主,一生只是为了守护她,整个汐落阁都是为她而生。他,苏逸萧,真的很欣慰,能成为她的哥哥,是他最疼爱的女人。他,皇甫清扬,一生放荡不羁,也为她一见倾心,到后来却也是梦一场,只因她是他的同父异母的妹妹。【盛昊天篇】某男:“我受伤了。”某女:“你受伤关我什么事,我又不认识你。”某男:“我不管反正我就要住在这里,你要无微不至的照顾我。”某女两眼放光:“住在这里没问题,要我照顾你吗!也不是不行。一百两黄金一天。”某男:“没问题。”虽然贵点,不过没办法,舍不得金子套不着媳妇啊!【轩辕熠篇】他指着自己的心脏一步一步走向她,“为什么你的心里就只有他,你知不知道我的心也会痛,它在流血你知不知道,为什么你就看不到我呢?”然后一把,把她揽在怀里,“跟我走好不好?做我的太子妃,我一生只你一个女人,哪怕有一天登上皇位,也只有你一个皇后,好不好?”女子挣脱他的怀抱:“对不起,我的心已经给了另外一个人了。”【皇甫清扬篇】他扼住她的下巴,逼着她与他对视,“为什么你明明已经中了忘情蛊,还是对他念念不忘?哼,总有一天我会让你心甘情愿的嫁给我的。”女子自嘲一笑,“如今我的心已冰封而死,现在的我只是一具躯壳而已,你想要拿去便是。”男子狠狠地甩开她,独自走出去。【小剧场】一个八岁大的小男孩,抬头望望天,这是什么世道啊!他才八岁,爹娘就丢下他不管,还要把一个国家丢给他。不大一会,一个八岁的小女孩走进来:“皇兄,姐姐来看你了,来让姐姐色一个。”他再次无语望天,他明明是哥哥,妹妹却叫着皇兄,逼着自己叫她姐姐。“那个皇妹啊!你不要每次见到哥哥就这么热情好不好,你皇兄的小心脏会受不了的……”还没说完,那小女孩已在他脸上亲了一下。小男孩的嘴角抽了抽。
  • 盛隋风云

    盛隋风云

    历史进程悠悠,千古多少离愁。不知黑白颠倒,只是一味荒谬……是谁,解危势于倒悬?是谁,拯万民于水火?是谁,舍身家于济世?往事如烟,虽随清风荡尽,但却总有丹青妙笔,将往昔峥嵘岁月.
  • 欲上星辰恋九天

    欲上星辰恋九天

    凤族幺女凤九天原是观音菩萨莲花池中一朵莲,在它花开破蕊之时,观音方知它绝非池中之物,便渡它转世为人,她与九重天太子星辰南宫相恋相爱,彼此要经历三生七世之苦的劫难方能神仙眷侣般圆满。