You see, Minnie teaches in the public school and she's away all day, and she don't like to have me make company of the hired girl, though she's a real nice girl. And there ain't nothing for me to do, and I feel like I wasn't no use any more in the world.
I remember that's what our old minister in Ohio said once.
He was a real nice old man; and they HAD thought everything of him in the parish; but he got old and his sermons were long;and so they got a young man for assistant; and they made HIMa _pastor americus_, they called it--some sort of Latin.
Folks did say the young feller was stuck up and snubbed the old man; anyhow, he never preached after young Lisbon come;and only made the first prayers. But when the old folks would ask him to preach some of the old sermons they had liked, he only would say, 'No, friends, I know more about my sermons, now.'
He didn't live very long, and I always kinder fancied being a AMERICUS killed him. And some days I git to feeling like Iwas a kinder AMERICUS myself."
"That ain't fair to your children," said Tilly; "you ought to let them know how you feel. Then they'd act different.""Oh, I don't know, I don't know. You see, miss, they're so sure they know better'n me. Say, Mrs. Louder, be you going to visit relatives in Baxter?""No, ma'am, I'm going to take care of a sick lady," said Jane, "it's kinder queer. Her name's Ferguson, her ----""For the land's sake!" screamed Mrs. Higbee, "why, that's my 'Liza!" She was in a flutter of surprise and delight, and so absorbed was Tilly in getting her and her unwieldy luggage into the car, that Jane's daughter forgot to kiss her mother good-by.
"Put your arm in QUICK," she yelled, as Jane essayed to kiss her hand through the window; "don't EVER put your arm or your head out of a train!"--the train moved away--"I do hope she'll remember what I told her, and not lend anybody money, or come home lugging somebody else's baby!"With such reflections, and an ugly sensation of loneliness creeping over her, Tilly went to assure Miss Minnie Higbee of her mother's safety. She described her reception to Harry Lossing and Alma, later. "She really seemed kinder mad at me,"says Tilly, "seemed to think I was interfering somehow.
And she hadn't any business to feel that way, for SHEdidn't know how I'd fooled her brother with that bird-cage.
I guess the poor old lady daren't call her soul her own.
I'd hate to have my mother that way--so 'fraid of me.
MY mother shall go where she pleases, and stay where she pleases, and DO as she pleases.""That makes me think," says Alma, "I heard you were going to move.""Yes, we are. Mother is working too hard. She knows everybody in the building, and they call on her all the time;and I think the easiest way out is just to move."Alma and Mr. Lossing exchanged glances. There is an Arabian legend of an angel whose trade it is to decipher the language of faces.
This angel must have perceived that Alma's eyes said, with the courage of a second in a duel, "Go on, now is the time!"and that Harry's answered, with masculine pusillanimity, "I don't like to!"But he spoke. "Very likely your mother does sometimes work too hard,"said he. "But don't you think it would be harder for her not to work?
Why, she must have been in the building ever since my father bought it;and she's been a janitor and a fire inspector and a doctor and a ministering angel combined! That is why we never raised the rent to you when we improved the building, and raised it on the others.
My father told me your mother was the best paying tenant he ever had.
And don't you remember how, when I used to come with him, when Iwas a little boy, she used to take me in her room while he went the rounds? She was always doing good to everybody, the same way.
She has a heart as big as the Mississippi, and I assure you, Miss Louder, you won't make her happy, but miserable, if you try to dam up its channel. She has often told me that she loved the building and all the people in it. They all love her.
I HOPE, Miss Louder, you'll think of those things before you decide.
She is so unselfish that she would go in a minute if she thought it would make you happier." The angel aforesaid, during this speech (which Harry delivered with great energy and feeling), must have had all his wits busy on Tilly's impassive features; but he could read ardent approval, succeeded by indignation, on Alma's countenance, at his first glance. The indignation came when Tilly spoke.
She said: "Thank you, Mr. Lossing, you're very kind, I'm sure"--Harry softly kicked the wastebasket under the desk--"but I guess it's best for us to go. I've been thinking about it for six months, and I know it will be a hard struggle for mother to go; but in a little while she will be glad she went. It's only for her sake I am doing it;it ain't an easy or a pleasant thing for me to do, either ----"As Tilly stopped her voice was unsteady, and the rare tears shone in her eyes.