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第30章 爱如断臂

Love Is Just Like a Broken Arm

?佚名 / Anonymous

“But what if I break my arm again?” my five-year-old daughter asked, her lower lip trembling. I knelt holding onto her bike and looked her right in the eyes. I knew how much she wanted to learn to ride. How often she felt left out when her friends pedaled by our house. Yet ever since she’d fallen off her bike and broken her arm, she’d been afraid.

“Oh honey,” I said. “I don’t think you’ll break another arm.”

“But I could, couldn’t I?”

“Yes,” I admitted, and found myself struggling for the right thing to say. At times like this, I wished I had a partner to turn to. Someone who might help find the right words to make my little girl’s problems disappear. But after a disastrous marriage and a painful divorce, I’d welcomed the hardships of being a single parent and had been adamant in telling anyone who tried to fix me up that I was terminally single.

“I don’t think I want to ride,” she said and got off her bike.

We walked away and sat down beside a tree.

“Don’t you want to ride with your friends?” I asked.

“Yes,” she admitted.

“And I thought you were hoping to start riding your bike to school next year,” I added.

“I was,” she said, her voice almost a quiver.

“You know, honey,” I said, “Most everything you do come with risks. You could get a broken arm in a car wreck and then be afraid to ever ride in a car again. You could break your arm jumping rope. You could break your arm at gymnastics. Do you want to stop going to gymnastics?”

“No,” she said. And with a determined spirit, she stood up and agreed to try again. I held on to the back of her bike until she found the courage to say, “Let go!”

I spent the rest of the afternoon at the park watching a very brave little girl overcome a fear, and congratulating myself for being a self-sufficient single parent.

As we walked home, pushing the bike as we made our way along the sidewalk, she asked me about a conversation she’d overheard me having with my mother the night before.

“Why were you and grandma arguing last night?”

My mother was one of the many people who constantly tried to fix me up. How many times had I told her “no” to meeting the Mr. Perfect she picked out for me. She just knew Steve was the man for me.

“It’s nothing,” I told her.

She shrugged, “Grandma said she just wanted you to find someone to love.”

“What grandma wants is for some guy to break my heart again,” I snapped, angry that my mother had said anything about this to my daughter.

“But Mom...”

“You’re too young to understand,” I told her.

She was quiet for the next few minutes. Then she looked up and in a small voice gave me something to think about.

“So I guess love isn’t like a broken arm.”

Unable to answer, we walked the rest of the way in silence. When I got home, I called my mother and scolded her for talking about this to my daughter. Then I did what I’d seen my brave little gift do that very afternoon. I let go and agreed to meet Steve.

Steve was the man for me. We married less than a year later. It turned out mother and my daughter were right.

“可要是我又把胳膊摔断了怎么办?”五岁的女儿颤抖着嘴唇问我。我跪下来,扶住她的自行车,看着她的眼睛。我知道她很想学骑车。每次她的朋友们骑着脚踏车路过我们家时,她都有强烈的失落感。但自从上次骑车摔断胳膊后,她就畏惧了。

“噢,宝贝,”我说,“我确信你不会摔断另一条胳膊。”

“但那有可能,不是吗?”

“是有可能,”我承认,想努力找一些能说服她的理由。每到此时,我就希望有人能帮我找到合适的语言,解决女儿遇到的问题。但是,经历一场不幸的婚姻后,单身母亲的苦楚,我倒也能欣然接受了。我曾坚定地告诉给我介绍男朋友的人,我要单身一辈子。

“我不想骑车了,”女儿边说边跳下自行车。

我们走到路边,坐在树旁。

“难道你不想和朋友们一起骑车吗?”我问她。

“当然想,”她点点头。

“我以为你想明年就骑车上学呢,”我补充道。

“我是这么想的,”她说着,声音几乎颤抖起来。

“宝贝,你知道吗?”我说,“无论做什么事都有风险,汽车失事会折断胳膊,再坐车也会害怕。跳绳能摔断胳膊,做体操也能,难道你也不想练早操了吗?”

“当然不是,”女儿坚定地说。然后她站起来,鼓起勇气决定再试试。我扶着车尾,直到她有胆量说,“放手!”

整个下午,我都在公园看着勇敢的女儿克服心中的恐惧,并暗自庆幸自己是个独当一面的单身母亲。

回家的路上,我们推着自行车走在人行横道上,她问起昨晚无意中听到的我和母亲的谈话。

“昨晚你为什么和姥姥吵架呢?”

母亲和别人一样关心我的婚姻,总是给我介绍男朋友。我总是拒绝和她物色的人见面,她认为史帝文很适合我。

“没什么,”我跟女儿讲。

她耸耸肩,“姥姥说她就希望你找个爱人。”

“姥姥想再找个人来伤我的心,”我突然说道,我很气愤,母亲竟把这事也跟女儿讲。

“但是,妈妈……”

“你还小,不懂,”我对她说。

她沉默了一会儿,然后抬起头,小声地说了句话,使我陷入沉思。

“这样看,爱情和摔断胳膊是不同的了。”

我无言以对,我们没再说话,默默地走完了余下的路。到家后,我给母亲打了个电话,责备她不该把这事说给女儿听。接着,像下午时我的小宝贝那样,我克服了心理障碍,答应去见史帝文。

史帝文很适合我,不到一年,我们结婚了。看来母亲和女儿是对的。

1. I knelt holding onto her and looked her right in the eyes. I knew how much she wanted to to ride. How she felt left out when her friends pedaled by our . Yet ever since she’d fallen off her bike and broken her arm, she’d been .

2. I spent the of the afternoon at the park watching a very little girl overcome a , and congratulating myself for a self-sufficient single parent.

3. Then I did I’d seen my brave little gift do that very . I let go and agreed to Steve.

1. 每到此时,我就希望有人能帮我找到合适的语言,解决女儿遇到的问题。

2. 无论做什么事都有风险,汽车失事会折断胳膊,再坐车也会害怕。

3. 我无言以对,我们没再说话,默默地走完了余下的路。

1. How often she felt left out when her friends pedaled by our house.

leave out:遗漏,省去;不考虑

2. “Yes,” I admitted, and found myself struggling for the right thing to say.

struggle for:为……奋斗;为……斗争

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