"'It's mebby six weeks followin' them declarations of the Purple Blossom.It's co't day at War-whoop Crossin', an' the Jedge an'
every law-sharp on that circuit comes trailin' into camp.This yere outfit of Warwhoop is speshul fretful ag'inst all forms of gamblin'.
Wherefore the Jedge, an' the state's attorney, an' mebby five other speculators, at night adjourns to the cabin of a flat-boat which is tied up at the foot of the levee, so's they can divert themse'fs with a little draw-poker without shockin' the hamlet an' gettin'
themse'fs arrested an' fined some.
"'It's gone to about fourth drink time after supper, an' I'm romancin' about, tryin' to figger out how I'm to win Polly, when as I'm waltzin' along the levee--I'm plumb alone, an' the town itse'f has turned into its blankets--I gets sight of this yere poker festival ragin' in the cabin.Thar they be, antein', goin' it blind, straddlin', raisin' before the draw, bluffin', an' bettin', an'
havin' the time of their c'reers.
"'It's the spring flood, an' the old Cumberland is bank-full an'
still a-risin'.The flat boat is softly raisin' an' fallin' on the sobbin' tide.It's then them jocular impulses seizes me, that a-way;an' I stoops an' casts off her one line, an' that flat boat swims silently away on the bosom of the river.The sports inside knows nothin' an' guesses less, an' their gayety swells on without a hitch.
"'It's three o'clock an' Jedge Finn, who's won about a hundred an'
sixty dollars, realizes it's all the money in the outfit, an' gets cold feet plenty prompt.He murmurs somethin' about tellin' the old lady Finn he'd be in early, an' shoves back amidst the scoffs an'
jeers of the losers.But the good old Jedge don't mind, an' openin'
the door, he goes out into the night an' the dark, an' carefully picks his way overboard into forty foot of water.The yell the Jedge emits as he makes his little hole in the Cumberland is the first news them kyard sharps gets that they're afloat a whole lot.
"'It ain't no push-over rescooin' Jedge Finn that time.The one hundred an' sixty is in Mexican money, an' he's got a pound or two of it sinkered about his old frame in every pocket; so he goes to the bottom like a kag of nails.
"'But they works hard, an' at last fishes him out, an' rolls him over a bar'l to get the water an' the money outen him.Which onder sech treatment, the Jedge disgorges both, an' at last comes to a trifle an' is fed whiskey with a spoon.
"'Havin' saved the Jedge, the others turns loose a volley of yells that shorely scares up them echoes far an' wide.It wakes up a little old tug that's tied in Dead Nigger Bend, an' she fires up an'
pushes forth to their relief.The tug hauls 'em back to Warwhoop for seventy dollars, which is paid out of the rescooed treasure of Jedge Finn, the same bein' declar'd salvage by them bandits he's been playin' with.
"'It's two o'clock in the afternoon when that band of gamblers pulls up ag'in at Warwhoop, an' they're shorely a saddened party as they files ashore.The village is thar in a frownin' an' resentful body to arrest 'em for them voylations, which is accordin' done.
"'At the same time, I regyards the play as the funniest, ondoubted, that's ever been evolved in Tennessee; but my mood changes as subsequent events assoomes a somber face.Old Jedge Finn goes fumin'
about like a wronged lion, an' the rest is as hot as election day in a hornet's nest.Pards, I'm a Mexican! if they don't indict me for piracy on the high seas, an' pledge their words to see me hanged before ever co't adjourns.
"'That lets me out, right thar! I sees the symptoms of my onpop'larity in advance, an' don't procrastinate none.I goes sailin' over the divide to the Tennessee, down the Tennessee to the Ohio, down the Ohio to the Mississippi, down the Mississippi to the Arkansaw, up the Arkansaw to Little Rock; an' thar I pauses, exhausted shore, but safe as a murderer in Georgia.Which I never does go back for plumb ten years.
"'Nacherally, because of this yere exodus, I misses my engagements with the Purple Blossom; also them nuptials I plots about Polly Hawks, suffers the kybosh a whole lot.However, I survives, an'
Polly survives; she an' the Purple Blossom hooks up a month later, an' I learns since they shore has offsprings enough to pack a primary or start a public school.It's all over long ago, an' I'm glad the kyards falls as they do.Still, as I intimates, thar's them moments of romance to ride me down, when I remembers my one lone love affair with Polly Hawks, the beauty of the Painted Post.'
"Enright pauses, an' we-all sets still a moment out of respects to the old chief.At last Dan Boggs, who's always bubblin' that a-way, speaks up:
"'Which I'm shore sorry,' says Dan, 'you don't fetch the moosic of that Purple Blossom's war-song West.I deems that a mighty excellent lay, an' would admire to learn it an' sing it some myse'f.I'd shore go over an' carol it to Red Dog; it would redooce them drunkards to frenzy."'
