登陆注册
5491300000044

第44章

"My dear man, whatever shall I do with you!" Philippa exclaimed pathetically, as the door closed upon the last of her callers.

"The Guards, indeed!"

Lessingham smiled as he resumed his place by her side.

"Well," he said, "I told the dear lady the truth. You will find my name well up in the list of the thirty-first battalion of the Prussian Guards."

She threw herself back in her chair and laughed. "How amusing it would be if it weren't all so terrible! You really are a perfect political Raffles. Do you know that this afternoon you have absolutely reestablished yourself? Mr. Johnson will probably call on you to-morrow - they may even ask you to dine - the vicar will write and ask for a subscription, and Dolly Fenwick will invite you to play golf with her."

"Do not turn my head," he begged.

"All the same," Philippa continued, more gravely, "I shall never have a moment's peace whilst you are in the place. I was thinking about you last night. I don't believe I have ever realised before how terrible it would be if you really were discovered. What would they do to you?"

"Whatever they might do," he replied, a little wearily, "I must obey orders. My orders are to remain here, but even if I were told that I might go, I should find it hard."

"Do you mean that? " she asked.

"I think you know," he answered.

"You men are so strange," she went on, after a moment's pause.

"You give us so little time to know you, you show us so little of yourselves and you expect so much."

"We offer everything," he reminded her.

"I want to avoid platitudes," she said thoughtfully, "but is love quite the same thing for a man as for a woman? =20

"Sometimes it is more," was the prompt reply. "Sometimes love, for a woman, means only shelter; often, for a man, love means the blending of all knowledge, of all beauty, all ambition, of all that he has learned from books and from life. Sometimes a man can see no further and needs to look no further."

Philippa suddenly felt that she was in danger. There was something in her heart of which she had never before been conscious, some music, some strange turn of sentiment in Lessingham s voice or the words themselves. It was madness, she told herself breathlessly.

She was in love with her husband, if any one. She could not have lost all feeling for him so soon. She clasped her hands tightly.

Lessingham seemed conscious of his advantage, and leaned towards her.

"If I were not offering you my whole life," he pleaded, "believe me, I would not open my lips. If I were thinking of episodes. I would throw myself into the sea before I asked you to give me even your fingers. But you, and you alone, could fill the place in my life which I have always prayed might be filled, not for a year or even a decade of years, but for eternity."

"Oh, but you forget!" she faltered.

"I remember so much," he replied, "that I know it is hard for you to speak. There are bonds which you have made sacred, and your fingers shrink from tearing them asunder. If it were not for this, Philippa - hear the speech of a renegade - my mandate should be torn in pieces. My instructions should flutter into the waste-paper basket, To-morrow should see us on our way to a new country and a new life. But you must be very sure indeed."

"Is it because of me that you are staying here?" she asked.

"Upon my honour, no," he assured her. "I must stay here a little longer, whatever it may mean for me. And so I am content to remain what I am to you at this minute. I ask from you only that you remain just what you are. But when the moment of my freedom comes, when my task here is finished and I turn to go, then I must come to you."

She rose suddenly to her feet, crossed the floor, and threw open the window. The breeze swept through the room, flapping the curtains, blowing about loose articles into a strange confusion.

She stood there for several moments, as though in search of some respite from the emotional atmosphere upon which she had turned her back. When she finally closed the window, her hair was in little strands about her face. Her eyes were soft and her lips quivering.

"You make me feel," she said, taking his hand for a moment and looking at him almost piteously, "you make me feel everything except one thing."

"Except one thing?" he repeated.

"Can't you understand?" she continued, stretching out her hand with a quick, impulsive little movement. "I am here in Henry's house, his wife, the mistress of his household. All the years we've been married I have never thought of another man. I have never indulged in even the idlest flirtation. And now suddenly my life seems upside down. I feel as though, if Henry stood before me now, I would strike him on the cheek. I feel sore all over, and ashamed, but I don't know whether I have ceased to love him. I can't tell.

Nothing seems to help me. I close my eyes and I try to think of that new world and that new life, and I know that there is nothing repulsive in it. I feel all the joy and the strength of being with you. And then there is Henry in the background. He seems to have had so much of my love."

He saw the tears gathering in her eyes, and he smiled at her encouragingly.

"Remember that at this moment I am asking you for nothing," be said.

"Just think these things out. It isn't really a matter for sorrow," he continued. "Love must always mean happiness - for the one who is loved."

同类推荐
  • 十地论义疏卷第一

    十地论义疏卷第一

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • Man of Property

    Man of Property

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 东槎纪略

    东槎纪略

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 历代蒙求

    历代蒙求

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
  • 观物篇

    观物篇

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。汇聚授权电子版权。
热门推荐
  • 追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    青涩蜕变,如今她是能独当一面的女boss,爱了冷泽聿七年,也同样花了七年时间去忘记他。以为是陌路,他突然向他表白,扬言要娶她,她只当他是脑子抽风,他的殷勤她也全都无视。他帮她查她父母的死因,赶走身边情敌,解释当初拒绝她的告别,和故意对她冷漠都是无奈之举。突然爆出她父母的死居然和冷家有丝毫联系,还莫名跳出个公爵未婚夫,扬言要与她履行婚约。峰回路转,破镜还能重圆吗? PS:我又开新文了,每逢假期必书荒,新文《有你的世界遇到爱》,喜欢我的文的朋友可以来看看,这是重生类现言,对这个题材感兴趣的一定要收藏起来。
  • 我的梦境怎么可能这么正常

    我的梦境怎么可能这么正常

    对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核对不起审核
  • 我不是猪大肠

    我不是猪大肠

    我们已知的世界正在被异常同化、封锁......这是一个冲破牢笼的故事......新的纪元即将开启......
  • 重生之最好时代

    重生之最好时代

    曾经年少轻狂在深蓝天空下许下的梦想!曾经从窗前走过的明媚少女啊!曾梦想仗剑走天涯……苏望:愿你出走半生,归来仍是少年PS:创建了个新的书友群:595905832
  • 闪婚之一生所依

    闪婚之一生所依

    唐依依在领结婚证那天被人放了鸽子,一怒一伤心之下,喝高了。不幸的被一直潜伏在她周围的灰太狼捡到,这样那样过后,他们领证结婚了。一个呆萌别扭的女人和贱萌固执的男人开始了他们逗比的婚后生活。
  • 追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    追妻无门:女boss不好惹

    青涩蜕变,如今她是能独当一面的女boss,爱了冷泽聿七年,也同样花了七年时间去忘记他。以为是陌路,他突然向他表白,扬言要娶她,她只当他是脑子抽风,他的殷勤她也全都无视。他帮她查她父母的死因,赶走身边情敌,解释当初拒绝她的告别,和故意对她冷漠都是无奈之举。突然爆出她父母的死居然和冷家有丝毫联系,还莫名跳出个公爵未婚夫,扬言要与她履行婚约。峰回路转,破镜还能重圆吗? PS:我又开新文了,每逢假期必书荒,新文《有你的世界遇到爱》,喜欢我的文的朋友可以来看看,这是重生类现言,对这个题材感兴趣的一定要收藏起来。
  • 关于转生成魔法少女的非日常

    关于转生成魔法少女的非日常

    一生朝着人生巅峰走的天才少女没想到一朝重生魔法大陆就直达巅峰,什么巅峰不巅峰的不重要,重要的是这一世有人宠有人爱只想当一只混吃等死的咸鱼怎么办?什么天降重任于斯人也?不不不,我只是个默默无闻的魔法少女而已啦!
  • 五岁“坏”宝贝

    五岁“坏”宝贝

    【此文中间小虐,剧情雷人,非女强】◆五年前,她被男友狠心抛弃,偶然间惹上那位比国际恐怖分子还可怕的富翁老外!只是简单的一句‘我要嫁给有钱人’却不曾想改变了她今后的整个人生!那时的她,只是他众多女人中的一个,有时候他甚至连她叫什么都会忘记!他只知道,只要跟他上过床的女人都是他的女人!他绝不允许她跟其他男人有过多瓜葛,连碰一下都不行。他,令她感到害怕!!!◆五年后,她不在是当年那个胆小懦弱的女人,她学会了说‘不’!身边也多了一个小鬼,蓝眼睛黄头发,与他极为相似,但是小鬼的爸爸在哪里?她不想知道!当年他默不作声的抛弃了她和儿子,她带着心里所有的恨,成熟起来。他们再次相遇,可是今时不同往日!她不在惧怕他,甚至学会反抗!可那个总是出其不意的坏宝宝却接二连三的让她崩溃,同时也给她带来很多欢乐!“妈咪,其实我希望你跟爹地和好,这样我就能够光明正大的让爹地教我把妹!”…◆坏宝宝经典语录:ON1:“妈咪,我昨天看了西游记,原来孙悟空真的跟我一样是从石头缝里蹦出来的!”某小鬼瞪大蓝色的大眼睛恍然大悟的说,只因为曾经‘一不小心’听到某位没良心的干妈瞎编了自己的由来。ON2:“妈咪!”某小鬼无辜的拉了拉正在厨房洗碗的女人。“我刚才把骨头塞给小兔子吃,它兴奋的睡过去了!”ON3:“妈咪!”某小鬼再次很无辜的瞅着生下自己的女人。“干妈尿裤子了,尿的还是红色的水!”ON4:“妈咪!”某小鬼看到门口有位长得与自己一摸一样的男人后兴冲冲往里跑。“门外有个怪叔叔抄袭我的长相在我面前耍帅!”ON5:“干妈,我考你一个低智商问题!”某小鬼双手背在身后,冲着某女一脸奸笑。“好!你说?”某位自称干妈的女人额头顿时黑线横生!“你先说三声老鼠!”某小鬼继续奸笑中…“老鼠?老鼠!老鼠!!?”“乖!在说三声鼠老!”某小鬼得寸进尺中…“鼠老?鼠老!鼠老!!?”某干妈有些莫名其妙。“猫最怕什么?”“老鼠!”某干妈不假思索。**********************************推荐自己的重生文:《重生—名门小妻子》‘对不起,您拨打的用户已结婚!’她鼎鼎大名,号称‘小老鼠’的盗圣蓝绯儿重生了,好吧,她接受!竟然重生到一个十六岁小妹妹体内,好吧,她也接受!居然才十六岁还成了别人的小妻子?靠死,她受不鸟了!
  • 妖妃要出逃:陛下,难伺候

    妖妃要出逃:陛下,难伺候

    “贱人,本来本殿还想给你一个痛快,现在看来你还是比较喜欢做人彘啊!”他话语里的恶毒,让……
  • 世界经典探案故事全集:原形毕露的故事

    世界经典探案故事全集:原形毕露的故事

    我们编辑的这套《世界经典探案故事全集》包括《侦探出动的故事》、《高超推理的故事》、《蛛丝马迹的故事》、《扑朔迷离的故事》、《缉捕追踪的故事》、《原形毕露的故事》、《斗智斗勇的故事》、《智破奇案的故事》、《真相大白的故事》和《插翅难逃的故事》等10册,这些作品汇集了古今中外著名的疑案、迷案、奇案、悬案、冤案等近百篇,其故事情节惊险曲折,探案英雄大智大勇,阅读这些侦破故事,不仅可以启迪智慧、增强思维、了解社会、增长知识,还可以学到自我保卫、推理破案的常识,防范日常生活的不测。