"It's forty-seven times," said Austin reflectively.
"When do you go?" I asked, for want of some better observation.
"I don't go," said Austin.
The conversation seemed to have ended there, but presently he came back to it.
"If I was to go, who would look after 'im?" He jerked his head toward his master."Who would 'e get to serve 'im?""Someone else," I suggested lamely.
"Not 'e.No one would stay a week.If I was to go, that 'ouse would run down like a watch with the mainspring out.I'm telling you because you're 'is friend, and you ought to know.If I was to take 'im at 'is word--but there, I wouldn't have the 'eart.
'E and the missus would be like two babes left out in a bundle.
I'm just everything.And then 'e goes and gives me notice.""Why would no one stay?" I asked.
"Well, they wouldn't make allowances, same as I do.'E's a very clever man, the master--so clever that 'e's clean balmy sometimes.I've seen 'im right off 'is onion, and no error.
Well, look what 'e did this morning."
"What did he do?"
Austin bent over to me.
"'E bit the 'ousekeeper," said he in a hoarse whisper.
"Bit her?"
"Yes, sir.Bit 'er on the leg.I saw 'er with my own eyes startin' a marathon from the 'all-door.""Good gracious!"
"So you'd say, sir, if you could see some of the goings on.'Edon't make friends with the neighbors.There's some of them thinks that when 'e was up among those monsters you wrote about, it was just `'Ome, Sweet 'Ome' for the master, and 'e was never in fitter company.That's what THEY say.But I've served 'im ten years, and I'm fond of 'im, and, mind you, 'e's a great man, when all's said an' done, and it's an honor to serve 'im.But 'e does try one cruel at times.Now look at that, sir.That ain't what you might call old-fashioned 'ospitality, is it now? Just you read it for yourself."The car on its lowest speed had ground its way up a steep, curving ascent.At the corner a notice-board peered over a well-clipped hedge.As Austin said, it was not difficult to read, for the words were few and arresting:--|---------------------------------------||WARNING.||----|| Visitors, Pressmen, and Mendicants||are not encouraged.|||| G.E.CHALLENGER.||_______________________________________|"No, it's not what you might call 'earty," said Austin, shaking his head and glancing up at the deplorable placard."It wouldn't look well in a Christmas card.I beg your pardon, sir, for Ihaven't spoke as much as this for many a long year, but to-day my feelings seem to 'ave got the better of me.'E can sack me till 'e's blue in the face, but I ain't going, and that's flat.I'm 'is man and 'e's my master, and so it will be, I expect, to the end of the chapter."We had passed between the white posts of a gate and up a curving drive, lined with rhododendron bushes.Beyond stood a low brick house, picked out with white woodwork, very comfortable and pretty.Mrs.Challenger, a small, dainty, smiling figure, stood in the open doorway to welcome us.
"Well, my dear," said Challenger, bustling out of the car, "here are our visitors.It is something new for us to have visitors, is it not? No love lost between us and our neighbors, is there?
If they could get rat poison into our baker's cart, I expect it would be there.""It's dreadful--dreadful!" cried the lady, between laughter and tears."George is always quarreling with everyone.We haven't a friend on the countryside.""It enables me to concentrate my attention upon my incomparable wife," said Challenger, passing his short, thick arm round her waist.Picture a gorilla and a gazelle, and you have the pair of them."Come, come, these gentlemen are tired from the journey, and luncheon should be ready.Has Sarah returned?"The lady shook her head ruefully, and the Professor laughed loudly and stroked his beard in his masterful fashion.
"Austin," he cried, "when you have put up the car you will kindly help your mistress to lay the lunch.Now, gentlemen, will you please step into my study, for there are one or two very urgent things which I am anxious to say to you."
