The festival that night was just as loud as the night before. More, in fact, since tonight was the beginning of the organized activities and competitions. The town never seemed to sleep when the Festival of Love was in session.
Keira chose a pub and went inside. It was still early but the place was already packed. She found a table in the corner and settled herself in, taking her notebook and pen out of her purse, then scoured the crowds looking for someone to approach. She wanted all different kinds of people, not just young women like Tessa who were just there for no-strings-attached encounters. What she really wanted was someone who was genuinely there to find love, someone who actually believed that they could be matched at this festival.
Just then, a man at the bar caught her eye. He was older than the average person she'd seen at the festival, with gray hair. She placed him closer to fifty. He was alone, sat on a stool watching the festivities as though he himself weren't really a part of them.
She stood and wended her way through the crowds until she'd reached the man. He looked a bit surprised to be approached by a young woman.
"Can I help you?" he asked in a thick Irish accent that Keira struggled to decipher over the noise.
She explained about who she was, why she was there, and asked whether he'd be willing to speak to her about his experiences of the festival.
"Sure, I've got nothing better to do," he replied. "I'm Patrick."
"Nice to meet you," Keira said. "I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but I couldn't help noticing that you're significantly older than the average person here. I was wondering what made you come here today."
Patrick laughed. "You mean I'm an old fart surrounded by beautiful women?"
Keira smiled and gave a shrug. "Your words, not mine."
"You can put that in your piece," Patrick added, tapping where she'd written the word fart in her notebook. He took a swig of his beer. "Okay, so you want my story. Here it goes. I'm older, yes, but it's not because I'm some horrible old pervert looking for a younger wife. There's plenty of men like me who find themselves without a partner at this stage of their life." He put his hand in his pocket and pulled out his wallet, then leafed through before pulling out a photograph. "This here is Susan. My wife of thirty years. Until she divorced me."
Keira wrote quickly, trying to decipher Patrick's accent.
"What happened?" she asked.
"Nothing, to be honest. The kids grew up and moved out. We both got older. I got comfortable, you know, let myself go, took her for granted. Then our business stalled and that meant the life I'd promised her never materialized. So she went off to find someone else who could provide it." He put the picture away.
"So you're here looking for some fun?" Keira asked. "Or some revenge?"
Patrick laughed. "I'm here looking for a wife!"
"You are?" Keira asked, wide-eyed. "You're not, like, over the whole marriage thing? Bitter? Jaded?"
"Of course not!" Patrick said. "I'm not bitter and I'm not over the hill yet. What I had might not have been enough for Susan but there'll be a lass out there who it will be enough for. Probably another divorcee." He laughed. "You get a lot of them coming here. That and widows. They're my best bet."
Keira was surprised. Her parents' own marriage had dissolved when she'd been very young, and her mother had lamented it for years. Watching her mom had meant that certain ideas were drilled into her head, and divorce was pretty much the worst thing she could imagine going through. It was a shock to meet someone who had not only gone through it but survived and come out the other end with their belief in love still intact.
"So you're planning on meeting with the matchmaker?" Keira asked.
Patrick nodded. "I already have. There was a lady in his book that he thought would be perfect for me. Eileen. She's forty-six, I believe, recently divorced also. Which means we've already got tons in common." He grinned.
"Are you going to meet with her?" Keira asked.
"That's why I'm here!" Patrick exclaimed. He smoothed his shirt down and his eyes lit up with excited anticipation. "I got in early so I could save us seats."
For the second time, Keira was shocked. She thought she'd singled out a lonely man in the crowd, watching on but unable to participate. Instead, she'd interrupted a divorced man waiting for a new date! Patrick hadn't been grateful for some company; Keira hadn't saved him from his loneliness. She'd merely been a way for him to pass the time while he waited for his date to begin.
The door opened then, and a woman in a beautiful emerald dress walked in. She was a similar age to Patrick, with gray hair covered up with blond streaks, a body that was bigger than the ideal. But she was glamorous, making the most of what she had, and looking very attractive for her age. She noticed Patrick and smiled.
"I should leave you to it," Keira said, backing off, feeling usurped, for the first time in her life, by an older woman.
Patrick's attention had already shifted to his date. He stood and kissed her on each cheek, then they both settled at the bar, the woman in the stool that Keira had just vacated.
Keira went back to her table and watched Patrick and his date as they chatted and laughed together. She noted the way she touched his hand as she spoke, and the sparkle in his eye as she laughed with abandon at one of his jokes. Once again, Keira felt another crack forming in her cynical wall. Maybe there was something to this. Maybe there were some people it worked for. Not someone like her, obviously, but for the older generation, ones who had already loved and lost and were ready to climb back on the horse again.
She stashed her notebook away realizing none of her interview with Patrick would make it into the final piece. The only way she'd be able to make it fit would be to turn him into a desperate caricature, something she was suddenly unwilling to do.
She would have to find someone else to interview, someone whose story aligned more closely with the cynical tone of the piece she was supposed to be writing. But everywhere she looked she just saw people enjoying themselves, people happy to be in new company, people who looked like they were falling in love. It was hardly the warts and all account that was supposed to be inspiring her. Instead, it left her with the most uncomfortable gooey, warm feeling inside.
Keira stood quickly before rushing out the pub and away from the claustrophobic atmosphere of romance.
*
Later that night, Keira received a welcome phone call from Nina. It was nice to get a taste of home, even if it was strictly on business matters.
"So Elliot loves what you've done so far," Nina told her. "And so do I. Your writing has dramatically improved for this piece. The tone you've taken is perfect. It's very evocative. I feel like I'm really there."
"Thanks," Keira said, smiling to herself.
"There is one thing, though," Nina said. "Joshua is out of the hospital and wants to dive straight back to work. But the doctors have signed him off for the month and he's not really supposed to come into the office. So Elliot thought it made more sense for him-Elliot-to take over the day-to-day Viatorum stuff and for Joshua to oversee the Ireland piece. Since he's on a ton of painkillers that mess up his sleep-wake cycle anyway, it means he can be more available for you. So basically Elliot isn't going to be overseeing the piece anymore."
Keira felt crestfallen. It was Elliot whom she'd wanted to impress, Elliot who held the key to her future career. Joshua would just take his usual approach to her work, of being derisive, dismissive, and critical.
Suddenly Keira felt as if the risk she'd taken in coming here might not actually pay off after all. How likely was it now for her to take that step up the career ladder? What if she ended up losing Zachary for nothing!
She ended the call with Nina and immediately phoned him. This silly game of silent treatment had gone on long enough. They needed to talk things through, properly, like grown-ups.
To Keira's surprise, the time zones must just have worked out because after several rings Zachary actually answered.
"I wondered how long it would take you to call," Zach said.
Keira frowned. "I've been in contact constantly. You're the one ignoring me."
Already she picked up on the combative tone. This was going badly and she'd barely even said anything yet!
Zach scoffed. "I didn't realize that photographs of sheep's butts and inbred soccer teams required responses."
"That's not all I've done," Keira replied cagily, feeling the need to defend herself.
"Oh, I forgot, there was also a drunk tirade. Thanks for reminding me." His tone was sharp, acidic, filled with venom. "You know, that's the sort of crap teenagers do, Keira. Sending drunk messages and stupid pictures. It's childish. This is the first time you've actually attempted to speak to me like a grown-up."
"If speaking was so important to you, why didn't you call me yourself?" Keira replied. She wasn't about to take the rap for their lack of communication over the last few days. At least she'd been trying. And Zach's condescending attitude was rubbing her the wrong way.
"Maybe because I was just having too much fun without you," Zach replied coolly.
A sudden jolt went through Keira. Something in his tone, the way he'd said it, had made her suspicious. "You mean with Julia?"
The other side of the line was silent.
"Zach?"
Keira felt a coldness spread all over her. His silence was speaking volumes.
"Zach, did you sleep with her?"
She heard him sigh. Then, finally, "Yeah."
Keira felt as if she'd been punched in the stomach. She couldn't catch her breath, so winded was she by his admission. She sat back against the bed, needing the support of the mattress beneath her to make it feel like the world wasn't dropping out from under her feet.
"I can't believe you'd do that to me," she stammered.
Zach sighed. "You'd gone and left me. I thought I made it clear that if you went to Ireland then I wasn't going to wait around for you."
"No, you didn't make it clear!" Keira yelled. "We argued, sure. You were pissed off. I get that. But I didn't think you were breaking up with me!"
"I wasn't," Zach replied. "You were breaking up with me. Remember? I said if you left I didn't think we could stay together. And then you left. As far as I was concerned, that was your way of ending it."
Keira fought for breath. Everything she was hearing was insane. Zach was trying to turn this all on her. He was trying to excuse his actions by making it seem as if she'd broken up with him. But as far as she was concerned, the words were never spoken between them to indicate that it was actually over.
"Even if you did think we'd broken up, it's not the classiest thing in the world to jump into bed with the first available woman," Keira hissed. Her voice came out hot, her tone accusatory.
"Do you know what, Keira?" Zach replied, sounding equally furious. "You're right. Julia was available. She was there. And that's a damn sight more than you ever were."
The call went dead.
Keira sat there holding the phone, finding it difficult to breathe. She hated crying but could feel now that there were tears streaming down her cheeks. She swallowed hard and found her throat completely constricted.
Had that really just happened? She'd never thought she'd hear such vitriol come from Zachary's mouth. For it be directed at her cut her to the core.
She realized then that Bryn hadn't been right about her and Zach at all. It wasn't a case of her and Zach being right at the wrong time, they'd just been wrong all along! Zach had just shown her a side of himself that she never knew existed, one that didn't support her achievements. He wasn't rooting for her success, he never had been. He just wanted a girlfriend who was there, putting him first, meeting his needs at the expense of her own.
It dawned on her then that Zach was a jerk. How had she never seen it before?
She crawled into bed and pulled the thin duvet up over her head. Outside in the street she could hear the noises of single people undertaking their continual search for companionship. For the first time in two years, Keira joined their ranks.
