(AGATHON appears on the eccyclema, softly reposing on a bed, clothed in a saffron tunic, and surrounded with feminine toilet articles.)MNESILOCHUS
I am blind then! I see no man here, I only see Cyrene.
EURIPIDES
Be still! He is getting ready to sing.
MNESILOCHUS
What subtle trill, I wonder, is he going to warble to us?
AGATHON
(He now sings a selection from one of his tragedies, taking first the part of the leader of the chorus and then that of the whole chorus.)(As LEADER OF THE CHORUS)
Damsels, with the sacred torch in hand, unite your dance to shouts of joy in honour of the nether goddesses; celebrate the freedom of your country.
(As CHORUS)
To what divinity is your homage addressed? I wish to mingle mine with it.
(As LEADER OF THE CHORUS)
Oh! Muse! glorify Phoebus with his golden bow, who erected the walls of the city of the Simois.
(As CHORUS)
To thee, oh Phoebus, I dedicate my most beauteous songs; to thee, the sacred victor in the poetical contests.
(As LEADER OF THE CHORUS)
And praise Artemis too, the maiden huntress, who wanders on the mountains and through the woods....
(As CHORUS)
I, in my turn, celebrate the everlasting happiness of the chaste Artemis, the mighty daughter of Leto!
(As LEADER OF THE CHORUS)
....and Leto and the tones of the Asiatic lyre, which wed so well with the dances of the Phrygian Graces.
(As CHORUS)
I do honour to the divine Leto and to the lyre, the mother of songs of male and noble strains. The eyes of the goddess sparkle while listening to our enthusiastic chants. Honour to the powerful Phoebus! Hail! thou blessed son of Leto.
MNESILOCHUS
Oh! ye venerable Genetyllides, what tender and voluptuous songs!
They surpass the most lascivious kisses in sweetness; I feel a thrill of delight pass up me as I listen to them. (To EURIPIDES) Young man, if you are one, answer my questions, which I am borrowing from Aeschylus' "Lycurgeia." Whence comes this androgyne? What is his country? his dress? What contradictions his life shows! A lyre and a hair-net! A wrestling school oil flask and a girdle! What could be more contradictory? What relation has a mirror to a sword? (To AGATHON) And you yourself, who are you? Do you pretend to be a man?
Where is your tool, pray? Where is the cloak, the footgear that belong to that sex? Are you a woman? Then where are your breasts? Answer me. But you keep silent. Oh! just as you choose; your songs display your character quite sufficiently.
AGATHON
Old man, old man, I hear the shafts of jealousy whistling by my ears, but they do not hit me. My dress is in harmony with my thoughts.
A poet must adopt the nature of his characters. Thus, if he is placing women on the stage, he must contract all their habits in his own person.
MNESILOCHUS (aside)
Then you make love horse-fashion when you are composing a Phaedra.
AGATHON
If the heroes are men, everything in him will be manly. What we don't possess by nature, we must acquire by imitation.
MNESILOCHUS (aside)
When you are staging Satyrs, call me; I will do my best to help you from behind, if I can get my tool up.
AGATHON
Besides, it is bad taste for a poet to be coarse and hairy. Look at the famous Ibycus, at Anacreon of Teos, and at Alcaeus, who handled music so well; they wore head-bands and found pleasure in the lascivious dances of Ionia. And have you not heard what a dandy Phrynichus was and how careful in his dress? For this reason his pieces were also beautiful, for the works of a poet are copied from himself.
MNESILOCHUS
Ah! so it is for this reason that Philocles, who is so hideous, writes hideous pieces; Xenocles, who is malicious, malicious ones, and Theognis, who is cold, such cold ones?
AGATHON
Yes, necessarily and unavoidably; and it is because I knew this that I have so well cared for my person.
MNESILOCHUS
How, in the gods' name?
EURIPIDES
Come, leave off badgering him; I was just the same at his age, when I began to write.
MNESILOCHUS
Ah! then, by Zeus! I don't envy you your fine manners.
EURIPIDES (to AGATHON)
But listen to the cause that brings me here.
AGATHON
Say on.
EURIPIDES
Agathon, wise is he who can compress many thoughts into few words.
Struck by a most cruel misfortune, I come to you as a suppliant.
AGATHON
What are you asking?
EURIPIDES
The women purpose killing me to-day during the Thesmophoria, because I have dared to speak ill of them.
AGATHON
And what can I do for you in the matter?
EURIPIDES
Everything. Mingle secretly with the women by making yourself pass as one of themselves; then do you plead my cause with your own lips, and I am saved. You, and you alone, are capable of speaking of me worthily.
AGATHON
But why not go and defend yourself?
EURIPIDES
Impossible. First of all, I am known; further, I have white hair and a long beard; whereas you, you are good-looking, charming, and are close-shaven; you are fair, delicate, and have a woman's voice.
AGATHON
Euripides!
EURIPIDES
Well?
AGATHON
Have you not said in one of your pieces, "You love to see the light, and don't you believe your father loves it too?"EURIPIDES
Yes.
AGATHON
Then never you think I am going to expose myself in your stead; it would be madness. It's up to you to submit to the fate that overtakes you; one must not try to trick misfortune, but resign oneself to it with good grace.
MNESILOCHUS
You fairy! That's why your arse is so accessible to lovers.
EURIPIDES
But what prevents your going there?
AGATHON
I should run more risk than you would.
EURIPIDES
Why?
AGATHON
Why? I should look as if I were wanting to trespass on secret nightly pleasures of the women and to rape their Aphrodite.
MNESILOCHUS (aside)
Wanting to rape indeed! you mean wanting to be raped. Ah! great gods! a fine excuse truly!
EURIPIDES
Well then, do you agree?
AGATHON
Don't count upon it.
EURIPIDES
Oh! I am unfortunate indeed! I am undone!
MNESILOCHUS
Euripides, my friend, my son-in-law, never despair.
EURIPIDES
What can be done?
MNESILOCHUS
Send him to the devil and do with me as you like.
EURIPIDES
Very well then, since you devote yourself to my safety, take off your cloak first.
MNESILOCHUS
