A few minutes more spent in the same kind of effusion,concluded his visit;and with repeated assurances to his sisters that he really believed there was no material danger in Fanny's indisposition,and that they need not therefore be very uneasy about it,he went away;leaving the three ladies unanimous in their sentiments on the present occasion,as far at least as it regarded Mrs Ferrars's conduct,the Dashwoods’,and Edward's.
Marianne's indignation burst forth as soon as he quitted the room;and as her vehemence made reserve impossible in Elinor,and unnecessary in Mrs Jennings,they all joined in a very spirited critique upon the party.
Chapter 38
Mrs Jennings was very warm in her praise of Edward's conduct,but only Elinor and Marianne understood its true merit.They only knew how little he had had to tempt him to be disobedient,and how small was the consolation,beyond the consciousness of doing right,that could remain to him in the loss of friends and fortune.Elinor gloried in his integrity;and Marianne forgave all his offences in compassion for his punishment.But though confidence between them was,by this public discovery,restored to its proper state,it was not a subject on which either of them were fond of dwelling when alone.Elinor avoided it upon principle,as tending to fix still more upon her thoughts,by the too warm,too positive assurances of Marianne,that belief of Edward's continued affection for herself,which she rather wished to do away;and Marianne's courage soon failed her,in trying to converse upon a topic which always left her more dissatisfied with herself than ever,by the comparison it necessarily produced between Elinor's conduct and her own.
She felt all the force of that comparison;but not as her sister had hoped,to urge her to exertion now;she felt it with all the pain of continual self-reproach,regretted most bitterly that she had never exerted herself before;but it brought only the torture of penitence,without the hope of amendment.Her mind was so much weakened that she still fancied present exertion impossible,and therefore it only dispirited her more.
Nothing new was heard by them for a day or two afterwards,of affairs in Harley Street,or Bartlett's Buildings.But though so much of the matter was known to them already,that Mrs Jennings might have had enough to do in spreading that knowledge farther,without seeking after more,she had resolved from the first to pay a visit of comfort and inquiry to her cousins as soon as she could;and nothing but the hindrance of more visitors than usual,had prevented her going to them within that time.
The third day succeeding their knowledge of the particulars,was so fine,so beautiful a Sunday as to draw many to Kensington Gardens,though it was only the second week in March.Mrs Jennings and Elinor were of the number;but Marianne,who knew that the Willoughbys were again in town,and had a constant dread of meeting them,chose rather to stay at home,than venture into so public a place.
An intimate acquaintance of Mrs Jennings joined them soon after they entered the Gardens,and Elinor was not sorry that by her continuing with them,and engaging all Mrs Jennings's conversation,she was herself left to quiet reflection.She saw nothing of the Willoughbys,nothing of Edward,and for some time nothing of anybody who could by any chance,whether grave or gay,be interesting to her.But at last,she found herself,with some surprise,accosted by Miss Steele,who,though looking rather shy,expressed great satisfaction in meeting them,and on receiving encouragement from the particular kindness of Mrs Jennings,left her own party for a short time,to join theirs.Mrs Jennings immediately whispered to Elinor-
‘Get it all out of her,my dear.She will tell you anything if you ask.You see I cannot leave Mrs Clarke.’
It was lucky,however,for Mrs Jennings's curiosity,and Elinor's too,that she would tell anything without being asked,for nothing would otherwise have been learnt.
‘I am so glad to meet you,’said Miss Steele,taking her familiarly by the arm,‘for I wanted to see you of all things in the world’;and then lowering her voice,‘I suppose Mrs Jennings has heard all about it.Is she angry?’
‘Not at all,I believe,with you.’
‘That is a good thing.And Lady Middleton,is she angry?’
‘I cannot suppose it possible that she should be.’
‘I am monstrous glad of it.Good gracious!I have had such a time of it!I never saw Lucy in such a rage in my life.She vowed at first she would never trim me up a new bonnet,nor do anything else for me again,so long as she lived;but now she is quite come to,and we are as good friends as ever.Look,she made me this bow to my hat,and put in the feather last night.There now,you are going to laugh at me too.But why should not I wear pink ribbons?I do not care if it is the Doctor's favourite colour.I am sure,for my part,I should never have known he did like it better than any other colour,if he had not happened to say so.My cousins have been so plaguing me!I declare sometimes,I do not know which way to look before them.’
She had wandered away to a subject on which Elinor had nothing to say,and therefore soon judged it expedient to find her way back again to the first.
‘Well,but,Miss Dashwood,’speaking triumphantly,‘people may say what they choose about Mr Ferrars's declaring he would not have Lucy,for it's no such a thing,I can tell you;and it's quite a shame for such ill-natured reports to be spread abroad.Whatever Lucy might think about it herself,you know it was no business of other people to set it down for certain.’
‘I never heard anything of the kind hinted at before,I assure you,’said Elinor.
